Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Diagnosed: High Style Esteem

After months of hiatus, much of which I spent pretending to work and visiting several brain shrinks, I came to find the reason to my shyness. I hadn't lost my voice, it's still here. I hadn't lost something to write about, I'm still complaining. But I did however, lose the HSE I was suffering from all of 2012. For those of you not in a medical profession, I was suffering from High style esteem. Basically I thought I was like bomb dot com until I noticed how realz high I rated my self on the style-dar. Like why would Karl's intern's assistant be thinking of me when he sketched this collection? And why would Phoebe Philo care how I hold her creations? Or in worst cases, (this is when I was suffering from Low Weight Esteem) try to fit my entire body into a tote.   It's time we discuss and re-asses the idea of any style-esteem...if only I knew where to start. Well, let's start with evidence. HSE ends when you realized you popped the arm-button off your Skaist Taylor jumpsuit from eating a gelato for an entire week (see image). Yeah, like how cute are you walking all around a southern italian town in cherry pop red playsuit from Katia, but um how un-cute to be the fat kid in it. I might have been pastry shop hopping on this street. Shhh. 

Jumpsuit  - bag 

Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Matchy - Matchy, When Food Inspires

It happened during Carnivale (a festive season that occurs before lent in south american countries, where you get school off, dress up in costumes, and celebrate life).  At the age of five, I went through a phase where I only ate foods in or near the color family of my clothing. It just so happened that I relapsed this summer when I ordered cotton candy gelato. A flavor similar to the turquoise adorned sandals squeezing my fat feet together. From complete satisfaction of devouring the pretty aqua sugar-based meal, I continued to try this for a couple of weeks, and by weeks I mean twelve hours because it did NOT work. First of all, I ran out of red ensembles to match the pastas I kept wanting to order in Italia. I'm thinking it might come in handy for fall when my relationship with Merlot-blends get serious...and the spilling slash accidents of over-self serving won't damage because, oh wait, you CANT stay with red wine if you are wearing red wine hues. But on the other hand you can pretty much lose all nutritious value to your diet, especially on a neon color blocking day. 

Cotton candy gelato, thanks to "Il Molo" in Gaeta, Italia

Friday, May 31, 2013

Fat Kids in Paris - Breakfast

Who ever thought fashion bloggers don't eat must not have met LA and I. Well mostly, must not have met me at all because, well, I have yet to master hiding the evident cookie rolls pouring over my Kenzo cinched waistline. Like a great addict, I tend to only friend those I can enjoy a proper meals with. Nothing irritates me more than the weirdo that invites you to dinner and really meant drinks. Like that was cool in college, but for cereal, mid twenties I need ma cereal. It's like my old trainer used to say, "once a fat kid, always a fat kid."
A fat kid day in Parigi usually starts with a walk to Cafe de Flore. Sometimes I'll skip the bread, and by sometimes I mean never. And sometimes I get a cafe a lait. And Sometimes I get a half cooked egg. And sometimes my terrible French makes LA laugh so hard she needs a bloody mary at 11am. All because I accidentally ordered a half a dozen half cooked eggs. It turns out finger-pointing to order is rarely effective. Damn you egg dozen on display. 

Monday, March 11, 2013

Spring off Leather

 I'm sick and tired of being told that leather is in for spring, and to fear not in quantity, because layering leather is mega-in. Well holy Ken Downing, who's seasonal tips I've greatly appreciated inside the NM doors, is really pushing it so I thought what the heck. One leather piece on my body wont hurt. Were in the big heart of Texas so I think I will spear the pits some embarrassment and avoid the easter toned bomber jacket and cream shift dress and opt for a leather garment that wont alter my body temperature. 

For those of ou that qualify belts under the accessories department, get the F out. Belts happen to cinch the most important part of my body, so under garment they must stay.

image per LA

Friday, March 1, 2013

Caught in a High Contrast

In my defense, knees are the most likely of places to retain liquid and by liquid I mean the excuse I'll spare you of as to why Michael's Cookie Jar products have me sleep walking to the kitchen since Christmas break. Can anyone break their Christmas break settled eating tendencies? If anything for the sake of Spring break in the near time future, I have no idea how I will break mine. And for that, I'm highly grateful for this Spring's high contrast black and white trend. Just like water, black flushes fat...especially when it is the tone of a wide waisted skirt that tends to conceal one's cookie handles (A.K.A. love handles, muffin tops, call it what you wanna call it). Diet unsolved, wardrobe resolved: there is nothing easier than exploring deepest darkest in your wardrobe and pairing it with your brightest and whitest.

because there's always more to the story...