Saturday, December 22, 2012


Mugshots are one of the only reasons I actually ever pick up an issue of US Weekly or the other Britney Spears bashing magazines next to the Kit Kat bars at the register. I've always wondered what mine would turn out like. I seem to be good at these things, my license and passport photos are kinda good. This is not an intentional humble brag but, people do a double take because I look absolutely nothing like the over bronzed lip gloss lacquered woman in the pictures. Weeks of neglecting Cinched at the Waist, I've been busted. Working else where and lack of inspiration has left me nothing to cinch about this month, maybe even ever. My mug has been shot. The crime? Leaving you all high and dry. Abandoning your loyalty and interest for a little of something else.

 A little of twelve days of amazing sales and gifts with purchases...

Thursday, December 20, 2012

Holiday Denim - SALE ALERT

Twas great shopping inventions like Gilt that have spoiled us to never shop full price, especially for the current. Well guess what type of denim you may be coveting right now that is discounted via another shopping revolution, Shopbop.   Although my thunder thighs and refrigerator wide hips have always veered me away from any type of denim that isn't black, J Brand 8 inch rises that have allowed me to tune into denim trends. 901's:   J Brand skinny jeans in a signature cut, revamped with a glossy, leather-like coating that has been wrinkled to create a unique texture. Faux front pockets smooth the silhouette, and patch pockets detail the back. Button closure and zip fly.    Check out these wax coated babies out on sale at Shopbop in several hues at 30% off

J Brand 901 Coated Textured Super Skinny Jeans

Other coated skinnies on SALE:

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Was Red

Seasonal dressing is over rated. I noticed I have the right type of friends when at a Holiday gift exchange last week I noticed not one of us was sporting red, green, or sequins. The crowd was composed of neutral tones of the resort top and waxed j brand sporting dolls.  Am glad I wasn't surrounded by a crowd that coordinates their ensembles the way Walgreens does their aisles. No Holiday dressing, heavens please.   What is with everyone color coordinating ensembles via Holiday as if they are picking new rubbers on their braces. Um yes, its October so I will go for orange and black set across my teeth, great idea doc. And yes, save me the lime, no sorry, mint green and cherry red for next month I come in for more pain slash tightening because it will totes be Christmas. Also, can I have a note to excuse my gum chewing at school?

Topshop onesie  - polka dot trim socks - Essie "beyond cozy"  -
 Becky velvet mini skirt  - Reindeer sweater  - cherry applique glitter flats -
Clare Vivier fold over clutch 

Red is just red, so get over it.  I'm tired of it storming my eyes when I shop online too long and covering my cheeks when I'm embarrassed. Really, the only great thing about red is wine.  Take Essie for example, they dodged the lame red tints by presenting an eclectic holiday collection, with "Beyond Cozy" and the glistening "Leading Lady." 
As for the red shiny glittery slippers... As if your boyfriend didn't already hate your sky high trots, CO has some quiet holiday flare to your next cocktail soiree. Jingle around in velvet red platforms with a bell-adorned ankle strap so you can jingle your way right into annoying party guest slash girlfriend. But then there's the red lipstick we can all try until three bubble flutes into a soiree and your teeth are half covered in red paint chip and chewing looks like watching a clown eat. 

This rant will end soon, especially since I've noted that I'm wearing red jeans today.
Because if loving him was red, what was hating? What color did the sky turn when he asked you to stop jingle-ing all the way in your Charlotte O's?

If you must shop Holiday this red month, then please do so wisely.

Monday, December 10, 2012

Walk, Walk, Walk

I took a walk
take a walk, take a walk
take a walk, take a walk.
- Passion Pit

Friday, December 7, 2012

Karl is Lashing Out

For a hot second it was nice and comfortable to hop onto the eyelash extentions trend. "You mean I DONT have to put make up on every morning for three weeks and it looks like I'm flirting every time I blink?" I asked the second I stepped out of an un-named local spa looking as batting as ever. Only to notice three weeks later that creepy lashes were all over my pillows and if I didn't return every 17 days to glue on new lashes, then the tops of my eyes would be as baren as ever because those fake lashes falling out was only pulling out my real ones. Damn you beauty trends and thank heavens for temporary lashes because guess who has taken over Shu Uemura for the Holidays...For the Holiday 2012, Shu Uemura announces an exceptional collaboration with the legendary designer and heavenly fashion father, ours truly: Karl Lagerfeld.  

Karl Lagerfeld for Shu Uemura eyelashes.

Don't miss out because this weekend is the last weekend to place orders to ensure on time delivery for Christmas XMASSHIP...

Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Totes Kerr

Au courant with everything every girl wants: pretty face, hot manfriend, hot baby daddy, and (to top it off) this season's it bags. Damn you supermodel Miranda Kerr, how come the universe sends all the goodies to you? It must be because you have an incredibly kind smile. Like I can tell we would totally be friends that have slumber parties and vege out by the TV watching the Mindy Project all night, and then I'd tell you how much I love your bags and you'd let me borrow em all the time. And then I'd tell you how much I love your baby daddy and you'd let me borrow him as well. Ha. Joke. Sort of.

Miranda Kerr in Prada flower applique bag.

Miranda Kerr's totes kerry-ing amazeballs bags. Dear Santa, (achem, mom) continue for more options...

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Shoe Dance

"Love your shoes,"
"Omg, I love YOUR shoes"
"Want to dance?"
Usually how it goes when I pick up a dance partner on and outing. This time, it was a spanish print adorned doll at Menil's twanky fifth celebration on Saturday. You'll be happy to hear no one spilled anything on my under wear booties. Thankfully, my friends only drink clear beverages, I can finally appreciate their love of low calories. Seriously, it seems like no one even eats anymore because bowls of Legos replaced finger foods at the small gathering before we hit up the Menil. Anyways, twas the perfect evening to wear the white laced subjects I'd been tucking away for one year and half...not even food could get on them. Thank you Houston for gracing us with just humid air and no actual rain that weekend, leaving all of us gals to show off our Holiday party shoes...

black trumpet skirt  -   lace booties (old)
CrOp by David Peck top & shorts in Spanish Moss Print

Back to party shoes and everything we need about them: comfort (sort of), extravagance, and excellent price. Check out my finds for two hundred doll hairs:

Sam Edelman "Paulette" peep toe pumps  -   Tibi "Abbie" booties  -
 B Brian Atwood platform booties   -  B Brian Atwood suede booties

And a couple other over two hundred doll hairs, but none the less on SALE:

Giuseppe Zanotti sculptural wedge -  Miu Miu glitter pumps  -  Jimmy Choo glitter pumps
Carven bow suede pumps  -