Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Was Red

Seasonal dressing is over rated. I noticed I have the right type of friends when at a Holiday gift exchange last week I noticed not one of us was sporting red, green, or sequins. The crowd was composed of neutral tones of the resort top and waxed j brand sporting dolls.  Am glad I wasn't surrounded by a crowd that coordinates their ensembles the way Walgreens does their aisles. No Holiday dressing, heavens please.   What is with everyone color coordinating ensembles via Holiday as if they are picking new rubbers on their braces. Um yes, its October so I will go for orange and black set across my teeth, great idea doc. And yes, save me the lime, no sorry, mint green and cherry red for next month I come in for more pain slash tightening because it will totes be Christmas. Also, can I have a note to excuse my gum chewing at school?

Topshop onesie  - polka dot trim socks - Essie "beyond cozy"  -
 Becky velvet mini skirt  - Reindeer sweater  - cherry applique glitter flats -
Clare Vivier fold over clutch 

Red is just red, so get over it.  I'm tired of it storming my eyes when I shop online too long and covering my cheeks when I'm embarrassed. Really, the only great thing about red is wine.  Take Essie for example, they dodged the lame red tints by presenting an eclectic holiday collection, with "Beyond Cozy" and the glistening "Leading Lady." 
As for the red shiny glittery slippers... As if your boyfriend didn't already hate your sky high trots, CO has some quiet holiday flare to your next cocktail soiree. Jingle around in velvet red platforms with a bell-adorned ankle strap so you can jingle your way right into annoying party guest slash girlfriend. But then there's the red lipstick we can all try until three bubble flutes into a soiree and your teeth are half covered in red paint chip and chewing looks like watching a clown eat. 

This rant will end soon, especially since I've noted that I'm wearing red jeans today.
Because if loving him was red, what was hating? What color did the sky turn when he asked you to stop jingle-ing all the way in your Charlotte O's?

If you must shop Holiday this red month, then please do so wisely.